Its done. He's gone. I don't think he's ever coming back. Its almost as if he never was. Only memories remain, only good memories, that make me smile still! There is a few scraps of Boston Red Sox material stuffed into a plastic bag, with the New England Patriots remnants. Its alittle like my heart. Its so hard sometimes, but I refuse to feel sorry for myself. I am happy. He came, I loved, he left, He's gone. For now or forever?? Only God knows! This I don't have to worry about any more. My heart will never be the same, but God has all the pieces. He knows how to, and he is putting it back together, stronger this time. The Lord loves me, He's taking care of me. He has held me together when I was sure I would break. Today the Storm has passed, and I will cling to The One who will always be there, has promised never to leave me, and I know he never will.
The future? I'm not sure. God only knows whether I will be allowed to freely love this man again, or another some day. Either way I will trust, I will rest in Him, in His strong loving arms. I will let Him be THE ONE who loves on me. I don't want to hope for another besides Him, cuz He is truly enough for me. He loves me, just like I am. He comes to me when I call. He holds me when I cry. He walks beside me delighting in me when I'm happy. He laughs at me when I'm teasing my family. He listens and loves me when I share my deepest hurts and secrets. He never forgets about me when He's doing other things. He gives me sweet surprises and gifts throughout the day, so I know He loves me. He lets me yell and vent my feelings then holds me as I cry myself to sleep. He doesn't get angry when I do this, but stays near until I am ready to listen to what He has to say to me. He always straightens out my messes. He fills my heart to overflowing with His joy. He even stays close, and makes me feel better when I'm sicker than a dog! and.... He always holds my hand just because.... Thank you Lord for being there for me, being my everything. I love you!
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